We Can Help You & Your Family or Friends

We believe everyone is valuable

I’m afraid of my partner

If someone is hurting you or making you scared, it is not your fault!

Domestic violence is about power and control. You can’t fix it or stop the abuse. The batterer is responsible for their behavior – and ONLY they can change their behavior.

What do I do if someone I know is being abused?

  • Don’t judge. A survivor already feels put-down by the abuser.
  • Listen. Tell the survivor it is not their fault. There is help available.
  • Be unconditional in your support, or the survivor may not use your help again – which assists the abuser in further isolating the survivor.
  • It is ok to be honest and supportive, but do not tell the survivor what to do – that is just as controlling as the abuser.
  • Help the survivor identify a support system: friends, family, DVSBF, etc.
  • Be patient. Leaving is a long and difficult process to break free: survivors may leave and return many times. One of the most important supportive acts you can do is to always be there – unconditionally.

Learn more about how to help a loved one who is being abused.

There is help available:

If you are abusing your partner:

Take responsibility for your behavior and make a commitment to change. Call UW hotline at 1-800-MEN-1089 – the Men’s Domestic Abuse Check-Up is a project for men 18 and older who are concerned or have mixed feelings about their behaviors toward their partner. Get perpetrator treatment from a registered perpetrator intervention provider. Learn more about perpetrator treatment, if counseling help and how you can know if he is changing.